Lately the husband and I have been commenting on how much we’ve been enjoying our little family. We were living in a bubble where our teamwork seemed to be in sync, Millie was a dream every day and loving every moment of her little life, and I dared to think we might have cracked it.
I had forgotten/ignored the fact that with every peak comes a trough. Two weeks ago was Millie’s birthday, and the following day we allowed the NHS to attack her tiny limbs (and deliver life saving drugs) for her 12 month jabs. Ever since that day we’ve been in a definite trough.
She had the predictable lethargy, fever and irritability that comes after jabs, and seemingly the irritability just never left. We get pockets of smiles, giggles and playfulness, but we’re also getting loads more crying, whinging and unhappiness, and it’s hard for all of us. We’ve gone backwards with weaning off the dummy, which is almost permanently in at the minute, and our improving sleep situation has gone way off kilter.
She’s also getting teeth through so that’s likely to be to blame, I’ve been ill which she may have had a bit of, and we’ve been away for a few days with disrupted routines, new people and places so she’s no doubt overwhelmed, but realistically I’m guessing. I’d love to say that a year in it’s educated guessing but I’m not so sure! I find this gets really tiring, because you never know if you’re doing the right thing, and even if you are for that moment it could all change again tomorrow.
I hate that my contented little girl is so troubled and I’m struggling to help ease her discomfort, and I hate questioning myself so much. I know this is normal but that’s not the answer either. I cherish so many moments with Millie but right now they’re few and far between!
So essentially I’m having my turn for a whinge. Sometimes you do everything you can think of and its not enough. Here’s hoping the next peak isn’t too far off!